The Rise of the ‘Trad Wife’: A Return to Patriarchal Values or Empowered Choice?
18 DEC 2024
In a world where feminism continues to advocate for gender equality, a counterculture has emerged—a romanticization of traditional gender roles packaged in an Instagram-worthy aesthetic. The "trad wife" phenomenon, short for traditional wife, is gaining momentum across the globe, fueled by social media and political conservatism. Proponents claim it’s a celebration of choice and femininity. Critics argue it’s a regressive reinforcement of patriarchal ideals.
Nara Smith (PC: naraaziza Instagram)
What is a Trad Wife?
A trad wife embodies traditional domestic roles: homemaking, caregiving, and prioritizing family over career. These women often glorify domesticity through content that features baking from scratch, child-rearing, and meticulous homemaking—all while dressed impeccably. The movement intersects with religious conservatism and biological essentialism, promoting the idea that women are naturally inclined to nurture and serve.
In the West, influencers like Hannah Neeleman, crowned Mrs. American in 2023, have popularized the trend. Her Instagram handle, @ballerinafarm, showcases her life on a rural Utah farm with her husband and eight children. From milking cows to home-birthing children, her content exudes an idyllic charm while espousing her Mormon Christian beliefs. Similarly, Nara Smith, with over 4 million Instagram followers, epitomizes the trad wife lifestyle through her carefully curated videos, often centered around her husband’s and child’s needs. Both influencers present the trad wife as an aspirational figure—a beacon of grace and devotion.
The trad wife phenomenon is deeply entwined with political agendas. As right-wing governments consolidate power worldwide, traditional gender roles are often repackaged as cultural values. In countries like India, this manifests in the celebration of the “family woman,” often framed as a counter to Western individualism.
Union Finance Minister Nirmala Sitharaman recently spoke about the resilience of Indian women, referencing historical figures like Indira Gandhi and Sarojini Naidu to uphold the notion that women thrive within familial structures. While her statement highlighted women's achievements, it also reinforced the idea that family is central to their identity. In this context, influencers like Renuka Kandasamy (@tamilmomblogger), a Tamil woman settled in Norway and a mother to seven children, amplify similar narratives. Her content glorifies large families and the joys of motherhood, often aligning with traditional values that view a woman’s worth through her role in the family.
L: Hannah Neeleman, M: Renuka Kandasamy, R:Swasika Vijay
Critics argue that the trad wife movement thrives on a veneer of choice feminism—a belief that any choice a woman makes is inherently feminist. However, these choices often stem from deeply ingrained societal conditioning. For instance, Kerala-based actor Swasika Vijay openly shares her desire to be “one step below” her husband. Her public statements on gender roles and marriage echo the same patriarchal ideals that trad wives celebrate.
Supporters, however, assert that embracing traditional roles can be an act of rebellion against the pressures of modern feminism, which they claim devalues homemaking. By reclaiming these roles, they argue, women exercise agency.
The trad wife’s success lies in its visual appeal. Instagram feeds filled with sunlit kitchens, neatly dressed children, and smiling couples create an irresistible narrative of contentment. The movement capitalizes on nostalgia, presenting an idealized version of the past that conveniently ignores the systemic oppression that accompanied these roles.
This curated aesthetic also perpetuates unrealistic standards. Influencers like Hannah Neeleman often present their lives as seamless and fulfilling, rarely addressing the privilege, labor, or emotional toll behind the scenes.
While the Western trad wife aesthetic often leans on Christian conservatism, its Indian counterparts incorporate cultural and religious practices like karva chauth or touching a husband’s feet. Social media influencers, from homemakers to celebrities, contribute to the normalization of these practices as aspirational.
The trad wife trend’s allure lies in its promise of simplicity in an increasingly complex world. For some women, it may genuinely represent empowerment and fulfillment. However, it also risks glorifying a lifestyle that upholds patriarchal values and marginalizes women who choose otherwise.
As the movement gains traction, it’s crucial to interrogate whether these choices are truly liberating or merely a rebranding of age-old gender hierarchies. While no woman should be judged for her personal decisions, celebrating roles that inherently restrict autonomy warrants a deeper conversation about the societal structures that shape these choices.
The trad wife phenomenon may be framed as a celebration of tradition, but at its core, it raises critical questions about freedom, feminism, and the boundaries of choice.
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